All Shall Be Made New

26 11 2008

Here I am again, myself and yet not myself; grown different and stronger and freer all at once!

Some background seems sensible, or I’ll be talking gibberish; the upheaval and changes in my personal life, while traumatic, have been enormously fruitful and continue to be so. I feel reborn. It isn’t so much a shucking off of old associations and ties but a reassessment of what it is that I want out of my life, the only one I have.

When you bump along without demanding control of your life and you allow the winds and tides to drive you, you are relinquishing the better part of the thing that makes you human; the ability to determine your path and form it in the image you create. This is a form of alchemy, small ‘a’; you imagine the result and then, eyes closed, you mould the method and release it to do its work. We do this every day, all day; managing and planning and making things happen.

I’ve been silent, recently, because I’ve been listening; listening as though my life depended upon it, which I sincerely believe it might actually do. The life I want, at any rate. I’ve been learning the tune and committing the words to memory. I do not want to simply live; I want to live forever. Ambitious, no? I’m not talking about immortality, in the spiritual sense; I’m talking about the superlative life, the life filled with sparkle and dash and vivid memory, not one moment wasted henceforth. And the beauty of it is that the raw materials are free and all that is required from me is will and a sound plan.

Between me listening to me, I’ve been listening to others; particuarly my lovely Seshat and her new joint venture, The Adversarial Path. Seshat has found a new and compelling direction for her life, and again she and I echo each other in this; what I’m enjoying is the difference between our processes and the diversity of the results. She has made herself new, as have I. She has a new path, full of danger and wonders; I have reaffirmed my commitment to the old path, with a will to go back to first principles once again and work hard on my spiritual and religious life. In this we support each other, reveling in our difference, discussing, disputing but always respecting. I’ll be visiting her and Alexander there at the AP, to read and learn and understand, the better to discuss and question and grow. 

For me this is the essence of the Pagan way; joy in difference, in understanding, in growth despite pain. I often find that turmoil in my life causes me to think afresh and with renewed clarity about my spirituality and my beliefs. It makes you meet your gods again, as if for the first time. It reminds you of the first time you met them. 

Yule is upon us; the start of the celebrations of the year in my particular calendar. It is also the anniversary of Seshat and I beginning our year and a day… and look at where we’ve come to.

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9 responses

26 11 2008
adversarialpath

No kidding! What a year … be careful what you wish for and all that 🙂

I have seen a huge change in you recently. You seem much, much stronger and more vibrant. Your path seems solid under your feet and I am very happy for you.

Even though our paths diverge, our mutual respect and love means we can rejoice in the other’s growth. That’s what love is about.

Your thoughts and contributions are always welcome on the Adversarial Path blog and forum – just cos you ain’t Left, doesn’t mean you can’t say something right … arf! I’m such a pun-artist LOL

Morgana/Seshat

26 11 2008
Tess

“life filled with sparkle and dash and vivid memory” – fantastic phrase, wonderful resolution. It feels like you have found something very important, I’m so happy for you.

26 11 2008
naufragiobella

Ah, yes. Respect is the key to harmonious diversity! My path is less “dark” than those close to me but we work just as well together and I’ll gladly support them in efforts that I might need to be involved in. I still REFUSE however, to invert my pentacle. LHP or not I like it the way it is. 🙂

Call me a rogue.

26 11 2008
The Green Witch

AP – it’s been a rollercoaster, all right. But what a ride. No-one could ask for better, or more beneficial experience. I love you.

Tess – you’re too kind – I was struggling there for words to describe! I am so grateful for your good wishes, they mean the world xx

Nauf, my angel – you ARE a rogue, but of the very best sort. Stick to yer guns, my girl!! 😛

26 11 2008
Brian Charles

A time of change and new beginnings, indeed! I have been going through a very major one myself.

Many blessings to you on your path – and yes, it is wonderful that we are each free to find our own way to “the superlative life”.

27 11 2008
The Green Witch

Brian, thank you. I will be going over to House of Inanna and catching up – haven’t been a very good correspondent of late! Blessings x

27 11 2008
Marya

So many changes, metamorphoses, transformations — very exciting.

And I look forward to ongoing conversation my Green Witch!

xxMary in Africa

28 11 2008
Mary In Africa

Such amazing transformations and brave choices!

I look forward to continuing the conversation, my Green Witch!

Mary in Africa

8 12 2008
The Green Witch

Bless you Marya – both times, lol!! 🙂

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